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Without alarm

May 19, 2004

bs"d

One of the first thoughts I woke up with this morning contained the awareness that I've woken up every day I've been in Israel without the aid of an alarm clock, naturally rising, with joy, sometime after dawn.

One of my teacher told us that two things interferred at first with his learning kabbalah: one, was a notion that he should be learning something else. The second, was a belief that he needed more sleep than the practice allowed for.

This fascinates me. I've always had a relationship with sleep that could border on excessive. It's just that I love dreaming so much; I have extended, vivid, intense, and memorable dreams on an almost nightly basis.

I inquired of my teacher if he felt that the brain state during learning in someway compensated for the lost hours of sleep. He was certain of it. I'm still not sure how to find practical, sensed refreshment from the process of learning (he said something about sleep really only being about a tired brain, and thought being stimulating, but I'm not sure...). Sure, I would love to be vitalized in awakeness, to need less sleep, to achieve dreamstates during lucid learning. In time perhaps.

I'm writing so much about sleep, I suppose, because it's 2:34am. We're learning in the park tomorrow, in honor of Yom Yerushalayim. I'm moving into my Nakhlaot flat too. An auspicious day for my first day of Israeli rent.

Alas, I don't think the internet connection in the apartment is going to work (for my Macintosh). So I'm going to have to find another way to get online. In time.

Love.

Posted May 19, 2004 02:38 AM